I don't know what's worse—Forcing myself to fit in with more people here that I don't feel close to just so I won't be bored, or just spending my remaining time here alone unless it's with the handful of people I've managed to actually become close with.
I was never the most popular kid in high school, but I felt a much greater connection to that social scene than I do to most people here. For a while, I thought it was because I'd been depressed and wasn't exactly approachable. Now that I'm not depressed, I've strengthened relationships with the friends I do have, but I haven't made any new friendships in a year. I know that I'm finally open to it again, but it seems like no one else who is no longer a freshman or sophomore cares about wanting to meet anyone new. Ugh. Sometimes I wish I was a freshman again. I would at least know not to take the constant opportunities for new friends for granted.
I want a boy—I want to hook up and be buddies, and maybe even be true friends or more if the feelings and the desire are there. I'd like to keep things low-key but I don't want it to have to be a total secret. Since this is first and foremost about sex, I'd like it if you were attractive (and I'm attractive myself, so I think that's fair to ask) and if you were regularly- or well-endowed. You should email me if this sounds like you and what you want!
Guys—Some guy was posting on yik yak about how he'd be down for anal with another guy. If that was you or if that sounds chill for you let me know, I'm a well hung good looking guy who'd be interested in getting it on.
Whitman—So many attractive women (mostly on the inside though it is a given most girls at Whitman are physically attractive). So many platonic crushes. Of course, many awesome friendships. Ah, my heart both aches and sings thinking of all the different universes, and that maybe in one of them I'm good enough for you. And in which one of all those universes will I come out the happiest?
Maybe it's this one?
Will you be so great that I will never again feel the need to look for someone else?
...Will I be so great?
I certainly hope so... Otherwise I will be aching all my life. In the meantime, I'll be smelling the roses I encounter, if you may, scouting for that fragrance that will make me forget any other fragrance.